The trolls of Norway, known for their bridge-dwelling, rock-eating, and questionable hygiene, rarely leave their misty fjords. However, one fateful day, a group of particularly adventurous trolls decided to embark on a diplomatic mission (or at least, that’s what they called it). Their goal? To visit Mount Olympus and demand a trade agreement with the Greek gods.

This was, of course, a terrible idea.

The Troll Delegation

Leading this grand journey was Grolg Boulderbelly, a massive troll with a stomach so tough he once accidentally swallowed a boulder and didn’t notice until days later. Accompanying him were:

• Snerk Stinkfoot, whose personal odor was considered a biological weapon in three human kingdoms.
• Ulf the Unyielding, who once spent 48 hours arguing with a tree, insisting it was in his way.
• Mossilda the Wise, who knew everything—except directions.

With their finest rock carts (square-wheeled, of course) loaded with delicacies like fermented goat cheese and pickled boulders, the trolls stomped their way southward.

Arrival at Mount Olympus

After several months of walking in the wrong direction (thanks to Mossilda), the trolls eventually accidentally crashed into the Parthenon in Athens. The humans, mistaking them for mythical monsters or really hairy tourists, screamed and ran away.

A helpful statue (which they mistook for a wise old man) finally pointed them toward Mount Olympus.

Upon arriving at the gates, they were greeted by Hermes, the messenger god, who took one look at them and sighed.

“Oh no. More tourists.”

Troll Diplomacy (or Lack Thereof)

The trolls were granted an audience with Zeus himself, mainly because the gods were bored and thought it might be funny.

“We have come to offer a trade!” bellowed Grolg. “You give us some of your fancy Greek lightning, and in return, we give you… ROCKS!”

Zeus, king of the gods, blinked. “We already have rocks.”

“Not Norwegian rocks!” Grolg insisted, proudly holding up a particularly ugly boulder.

Zeus was unimpressed. But before he could send them away, Ares, the god of war, perked up.

“Wait a minute… these trolls are huge, dumb, and violent. I like them!”

The Troll-Olympian Challenge

Ares, always looking for a fight, proposed a contest between the trolls and the gods to settle the matter. If the trolls won, they’d get one magical lightning bolt (which they planned to use as a really fancy bridge decoration). If they lost, they had to leave Mount Olympus immediately and forever.

The challenges were as follows:

1. Strength Test: Boulder-Throwing

• Hercules threw a boulder over three mountains.
• Grolg Boulderbelly ate the boulder instead.

Winner: Unclear.

2. Wisdom Test: Riddle Solving

• Athena asked the trolls: “What walks on four legs in the morning, two in the afternoon, and three in the evening?”
• Snerk Stinkfoot’s answer: “A confused goat?”

Winner: Athena.

3. Speed Test: Running Up Mount Olympus

• Hermes, the fastest god, reached the top in a blink.
• The trolls got distracted halfway up by a particularly tasty-looking moss patch.

Winner: Hermes.

4. Endurance Test: Who Can Sit Still the Longest?

• Zeus sat on his throne looking majestic.
• Ulf the Unyielding sat on a rock… and refused to move.

After three whole days, Ulf was still sitting there, stubborn as ever.

Winner: Ulf! (And possibly trollkind.)

The Aftermath

In the end, the gods decided that while the trolls were useless at most things, their sheer stubbornness and refusal to move were too much even for Zeus himself. Not wanting to deal with them any longer, he gave them a single lightning bolt just to make them leave.

The trolls, victorious in their own ridiculous way, cheered, ate more rocks, and stomped their way back to Norway—where they proudly placed the lightning bolt on a bridge and immediately forgot what it was for.

The moral of the story?

Never underestimate trolls. They may not be smart, they may not be fast, but they will sit there and refuse to leave until they get what they want.

Speaking of these behemoth creatures, you might be interested in delving deeper into Norse mythology and understanding more about Trolls. This article covers their mythological origins, descriptions, and various stories associated with them from across Scandinavian history. You would also be fascinated to read about Zeus, the mighty god of Olympus. The Zeus Wikipedia page has an extensive account of his mythological exploits, his divine powers, and representation in classical literature and art. Lastly, our story sparks curiosity about Norway, the home of trolls. Find out more about this beautiful Nordic country, its fjords, culture, and more on the Norway Wikipedia page. Uncover the mystic charm that lured our Trolls into this adventurous journey!